Skip to content
February 4, 2013 / admin

Black Women on the Global Stage – Is our Overt Sexuality a Good Thing?

Following the Superbowl I hopped on to twitter and everyone was abuzz about Beyonce. Particularly, a LOT of my white male friends were commenting on how HOT and SEXY she was.

If you missed the show – here it is:

This made me think of two things:

I recalled a conversation I had with a White friend of mine who informed me that there really didn’t seem to be many cute black girls. When he said that I found myself ready to take offense and sensing that, my friend clarified that he only ever saw HOT or SEXY black girls but not so much the cute, girl next door type.

Now this was something to chew on. For example, all of the Black women in the entertainment industry are seriously SEXUALIZED. I can admit Beyonce looked ridiculously sexy gyrating on stage in her heels and short leather cutout dress. Her facial expressions were raw and come hither-ish and she was oozing sex appeal. The other black women on top of her game, Rihanna, is the exact same way. And every other entertainer seems to have that hardcore sex appeal down pact. But where are the cute, wholesome black girls? The Taylor swift types to be the ying to the Beyonce/Rihanna yang?

I’m sure a lot of my white guy friends would love to have a night with a Beyonce type of black girl, but the more important question is would he want to make her his girlfriend – because frankly most men aren’t all that picky about who they’ll sleep with? Would she be considered girlfriend material or one night stand material?

Every guy wants other men thinking his woman is beautiful and that he lucked out into snagging her, but most men don’t want his woman going out of her way to get sexual attention from other men and perpetuating such attention in her dress and speech (e.g. wearing revealing hyper-sexualized outfits that leave nothing to the imagination out and about every day and flirting with every guy in sight)

So, my questions:
Should we just be content that some black women are getting shine on the global stage or is the fact that the black women are always half naked and selling sex bad for our image/brand of black girls being good girlfriend material and more than fling/one night stand material?

Am I just not on the up and up and there are famous black women with wholesome images doing the thing out there? (e.g. The Taylor Swift types)

Which category do you fall in (The hot/sexy vixen or the wholesome girl-next-door image) and how has that affected your romantic endeavors with white men?



Leave a Comment
  1. Danielle Hill / Feb 4 2013 5:55 pm

    I’m the girl next door type, and I don’t think that it gets nearly the same attention as being more in your face in your dress and if you wear more makeup. But I think that we should be true to who we want to be and not project a false image our ourselves just to attract men.

  2. hougurlaw / Feb 4 2013 7:38 pm

    Gabrielle Union is a cute, girl-next-door type. In fact, you can be both. I’ve seen Gabbie in sexy ads, and didn’t think anything wrong of it. Carmen Ejogo has a very cute, girl-next-door demeanor, but can be sexy as hell, as we’ve seen in Sparkle. I think a woman is better off possessing both.

  3. x.Posh / Feb 6 2013 12:24 pm

    wow, never really thought about it this way.

  4. Overtymer Adio / Feb 7 2013 3:38 pm

    They died out a long time ago. Somewhere in the late nineties and early 2000’s when that particularly type of women started to disappear. Call it the good girl gone bad syndrome.

  5. Lady A / Feb 14 2013 11:03 am

    Because unfortunately it’s what men prefer. Black women can’t be “Girl Next Door” only or we’ll be considered “boring” or not “appealing” enough. We can’t be too sexy because we’ll be considered too your face, sluts, whores and all of the above then be written off as not partner material. I think we give too much credit into what other people think we should be. Once women let things come to them naturally and stop worrying about what others think then we’ll be better off. There’s plenty of both types of black women out there, who can also switch it up. We just need to naturally let it come out.

  6. kera / Feb 14 2013 5:17 pm

    they are still some out there it’s just that they dont get half the publicity that these woman get mainly be cause of their appeal they broadcast in my eyes. my favorites are angela taylor with her awesome song chia tea latte, corrine bailey, esperanza spalding, and these are just to name a few. the reason these women arent so known again is because of the lack of acknowledgment. All homely girl next door looking black women 🙂

  7. Deb / Feb 25 2013 12:17 pm

    Focusing on what your friend said, I imagine he was talking about non-famous black women.

    Honestly, most black women see in real life are girl next door attractive. Not many women are hot/sexy looking in everyday life (except when they aim to be during the nighttime). Maybe the looks he has deemed to be girl next door attractive are white-centric so he can’t see it in a african or african american female. It wouldn’t be surprising in this white worshipping society we live in. I’m not saying you or anyone on here does but I recently stopped looking to such a society to base an understanding or value of my beauty upon. It’s given me such peace and a love for the diverse and undercelebrated beauty of africa and it’s global diaspora.

  8. August / Mar 12 2013 8:03 pm

    I think that black women naturally exude a lot of confidence and sex appeal!

    It is engrained in us culturally and there isn’t much that we can do about it! Even the most “cutesy” “girl next door” black girl will seem vivacious standing next to the average “cutesy” “girl next door” white girl. Black women, along with Hispanic women, Italian women, Greek women and pretty much every other race of women are good at being women. The way we move, flirt, dance, walk and talk, its appealing and its mature.

    I kind of resent the fact that white guys are so obessesed with grown women having the same mannerisms as adolescent girls. I think we should embrace our sex appeal and that there should be a difference between how I carry myself versus a “girl next door” because guess what guys? I DONT LIVE NEXT DOOR ANYMORE…I MOVED OUT OF MY PARENT’S HOUSE 10 YEARS AGO AND I HAVE MY OWN CONDO, hahahahaha!!! I love white guys but seriously I am 28 years old not 15 and I don’t want to dress or act like it either.

  9. Mark / Jun 18 2013 3:44 pm

    I agree with you August. Black women of America have a natural sultriness that you ladies can’t turn off. Most black women have ‘full’ everything when it comes to delectable bodies. I’m just glad I’m a man that is able to appreciate those inherent qualities. For the small minded men who don’t agree….they can just kiss your ass ‘in the crack’.

  10. Simpson, carol / Jun 24 2016 1:44 pm

    Wow , a good insightful thought….im looking forward to this conversation. …not sure where my thought are ….On one hand my mind wants to go on the defensive bring up the Michelle Obama s, India Arie s, the gymnast ,the tennis players,the literal girl next store…..and I pains me cause cause history shows that as black woman were thought of sex objects while still girls by their slave owners and now in 2016 we are still thought of only sex objects. .. many times perpetuated by us …

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: