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February 25, 2012 / admin

Reader Submitted Post – Fostering Better Relationships with Friends/Family

Submitted by Brenda Jones

In the global arena the man woman couple set, before marriage seems to be one that evolves through stages. I have simply put together three stages. The initial meeting stage is when they learn everything about each other. Next is the emotional baggage stage where they both start to learn how to react to each other’s squirks. The final stage is the one where they either decide to try to build a life or split. Amicable or not each person has tested and tried their partners in the second stage. (stages have not been studied)

We see couples everywhere in magazines, on television, and of course online. These couples are usually the same racial make up. The interracial couple dynamic, black woman (bw) and white man (wm) does not have a voice from what I have seen. These couples are seen as mere pairing in advertisements not a couple. However, when wm and bw couples are seen in public the reaction is usually negative. I will use some of my personal knowledge to illustrate. I knew a wm bm couple that had a very rocky first stage relationship because the wm was overly sensative about how black people reacted to him in public when he was with his girlfriend. This caused them both problems in a stage of their relationship that was already fraught with issues of getting to know each other. The black woman also had to deal with her friends and family and their insensative comments about “dating the enemy”. There was a knock on effect for the wm to prove that his affections were genuine and for the black women to prove she was not a traitor.

I have just scratched the surface of wm and bw relationships here. What I want are solutions, suggestions and or tools to help foster better relationships with those family and friends of wm bw couples.



Leave a Comment
  1. raynasybelle / Apr 6 2012 5:07 pm

    I think this post is great, but it feels like the beginning of a series.


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