A Note to Black Women: Be Encouraged, Date out!
I am a black woman married to a white man. As I see it any black woman that feels she wants to date a white man or has the idea of dating a white man should do it. However, know that your friends and relatives that are black or white, may not understand your preference because of cultural differences and racial prejudice.
The main issue you may face in most US cities is racisim as a interracial couple. I believe that should not stop you. If you have wondered about dating a white man start by researching local newspapers, magazines and the Internet. The Internet has many Interracial sites but, if you are afraid of starting your search in cyberspace start in your own backyard. Remember you are more than just an advertisement for “looking for a black chick or a mocha honey”. Be selective and ask questions such as: why do you want a black woman, and have you ever dated a black woman. My personal favorite question is “when was the last time you took a black woman to dinner?” It is important to know what type of man you are dealing with first and foremost and if he is serious about interracial dating.
The white man and black woman pairing is differenet than the norm of black man and white woman because there is not a shortage of white women for white men and thus the conundrum. When you, as a black woman is seen in public with a white man romantically, it may cause ill feelings for people in a social setting. That said, both of you must talk beforehand about dealing with racist comments and negative backlash from people in public. In addition, it is important for you to have a game plan for dealing with family situations as well.
Black women NEVER believe you are selling out by dating a white man! You have a right to date or marry who you want. If you prefer a white man then mean it and stick to your convictions! Tell everyone in your circle of friends and family that you prefer a white man for a boyfriend, lover, or life partner.
I will keep in touch with my thoughts. Look for my book yet untitled about interracial “white man black woman relationships”.